I finally crafted a mission statement I am willing to allow to represent me to others. Now don’t get me wrong, I haven’t abandoned my personal mission statement of “I choose to live passionately, authentically, unapologetically.” While very personally meaningful, this is clearly not audience appropriate. Thus the mask:
Break the Mold
Dare to Thrive
I find it ironic that the “public version” (or the mask as I think of it) is actually longer than my personal mission; however, I suppose I’m not terribly surprised as I find that I am often more verbose when trying to avoid superfluous truths. After creating this image last week, I took it to show MCF. I explained to him that he was right in pointing out that I was trying to create a mission statement which was both personally meaningful and audience appropriate, as well as in saying that I have the ability to choose how much I show others. After giving this some thought, I realized I could keep my mission statement that I like and create another which is related but less revealing to serve as the public-face of my mission statement.
MCF was quite enthusiastic in response to this mask, repeatedly telling me how much he liked it. While I can’t pinpoint any specific reasons to seek his approval, I undoubtedly do. I’m not sure quite what’s happening, but things between us are changing. Although I see him far less often than I previously have, our interactions are significantly more straightforward and involve a great deal more smiling and laughing than ever before. Last week he told me he enjoys my presence, to which I responded, “Don’t say that or you’ll never get me out of here!” He chuckled and said that he had to because he had performance reviews. Thanks to my calendar-stalking I was already aware of this and knew I needed to leave. However, MCF admitting, unprompted, to enjoying my presence filled me with warmth. Actually, it still does.
I don’t expect to have much availability this week, so I stopped by MCF’s office this morning for no reason other than wishing to be in his presence. We chatted about inconsequential things, including my motorcycle. I told him that I rode it on the freeway for the first time yesterday and he asked, “Now, don’t take this the wrong way, but you’re petite and I imagine your bike isn’t very heavy, so does that mean you get blown around more?” Last week when we were discussing my motorcycle also, he mentioned, “Well, you’re petite, you aren’t exactly 5’8, 5’9 or 6′, how tall is your motorcycle?” So in the span of a single week he has brought up my physicality twice. Granted both times were connected to a discussion about my motorcycle, but I can’t help but wonder if he’s taken new interest in me physically? After all, I can’t think of any circumstances under which I would be offended by his observing that I am petite. Or perhaps my hoping that he is interested in me physically is exactly what he meant by, “don’t take this the wrong way.” I hope not…
MCF has countless times given me the strength not to fall to pieces and I honestly would be content to just sit and stare at him endlessly…I never get my fill. I love this new openness and ease between us. Now that I’m healthier and happier, have advanced in my career and am spending my days doing work that I am passionate about, I don’t need much of anything from MCF as a mentor any longer. Our interactions are almost starting to feel like *friends* which is honestly more than I ever hoped. Here’s hoping for the future…!