Where is the line with you?

The kinky adventures of a painslut

Trigger warning:  self harm

I’ve started a new SSRI drug for my anxiety, escitalopram, and as all SSRIs, it works very slowly. I’ve been having bad nausea as a side effect and also been more anxious in general. Yesterday I was seeing a friend, who gave me a bunch of spare needles they didn’t intend to use. I wasn’t going to do anything but I really felt like I wanted to calm down and so I figured I’d do a little solo needle play.

It’s a strange feeling, really. It’s so meditative and so calming and not sexual at all, even if the urge and the reaction is still there, only very hidden. I acknowledge the fact that if I was in the right company, I would probably by climbing the walls and begging to be fucked, and not very calm at all, but I’m not, and instead it’s so…

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